Prelude to Winter
by senpaicutie64
Summary: Bella's wedding went terribly wrong, bitten by Jasper and they both are forced to hide away. Bella's memories with Edward are blurry, and she feels that he does not love her anymore. She has a chance to run into him again, after all these years. Will she?
1. Introduction to an Eternal Winter

Hello! Another one of my stupid ideas, but I think it will go somewhere, and sorry to all of you Edward/Bella fans, I am one myself! It will turn out that way, eventually...or maybe not...you'll just have to wait and see! No flames, please.

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_Out of the corner of my eyes, I caught something that made my breath catch in my throat, my pupils dilate in fear, and my blood freeze over. Why was this happening? This was all in a matter of seconds, yet the world slowed down and my pulse thudded in my ears as time and space was slowed down. This wasn't real, yet it was too detailed to be a dream. This shouldn't be happening…_

_It was Jasper that alarmed me. His eyes were dark, and a true predator look had stolen over his features, hunching his back over and his stony face contorted in agony. I opened my mouth in a scream, but nothing came out. Everything I saw was blurred, and yet so clear. Everything in a trance, some surreal nightmare straight from the deepest depths of hell that only I was witnessing._

_In a spit second, every mind contorting detail fell into place, the exact same moment that Jaspers haunting eyes met mine slowly, and my blood once again boiled, then froze over from the sheer menace of his piercing glare. Edward might have been calling me, alarmed with my bizarre actions. He may have noticed Jasper, he may have realized what was going on at the worst place possible at the worst possible time for Jasper to be showing these signs of such desperate hunger. _

_Our wedding, nothing less._

_The things that happed from that moment on were straight from hell, from my worst nightmare. Edward and the other Cullen's realized what was going on and what life-threatening danger I was in._

_As Jasper lunged for me, the last thing I saw was Edward's lasting expression, and the scream that left my lips, and my blood that pounded out a rapid beat for the very last time._

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_**This is what I brought you this you can keep**_

_**This is what I brought you may forget me**_

_**I promise to depart just promise one thing**_

_**Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep**_

_**This is what I brought you, this is you can keep**_

_**This is what I brought you may forget me**_

_**I promise you my heart just promise to sing**_

_**Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep

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The wintry weather was now coming down in soft flakes, swirling around in the cool breeze, and coming to rest on the snow-sheathed ground. I gazed up at them longingly, watching how some never reached past the canopy of the bare trees, creating a romantic scene in the forest. How I wished I could feel them melt as I caught them on my tongue, and how I couldn't even remember how it felt to have the blood rush to my cheeks as the temperature dropped. I couldn't feel at all.

I should have been frozen by now, as I was only in a white strapless dress that blended into the snow that I was lying on. My bare arms and legs would have been nippy and chilled, and yet they weren't. My face should have been red and frost-bitten, but it was only snow-white, marble-hard, and as cold as the snow that was falling from the trees over me. And I _shouldn't _be able to hear, in concentrated form, the snow hitting the ground with a small tap, every single flake in this forest, for miles on. And yet I could.

Some flakes landed on my long eyelashes, catching and making them heavier. I closed my eyes, and welcomed the winter.

Of course, Jasper had been gone in a flash at the tragic scene of the wedding. Luckily, by some miracle, none of my relatives had been at my wedding to witness Jaspers behavior. In fact, everyone I knew thought I was dead, killed by a tragic car crash in a rain storm. But it didn't matter now, anyways. Most of the people I once knew were dead or going to die soon. The mortals, anyway, the other ones of course would be here for eternity.

Jasper had dashed me off to a small, isolated place that who knows where it was. There, at least, he could get over the smell of my blood because I was already half-vampire anyways. He stayed with me, calming me when I cried out with pain, and apologizing over and over again for what he had done, because we both knew that there was no going back. It was indescribable, the agony of becoming a vampire, all very surreal and twistedly terrifying. Worse of all, the one I loved wasn't there for me, the one that was supposed to be putting me through this. Jasper moved me over the days, keeping us out of range of Edward, who had probably been tracking me, searching for me desperately. I could only imagine Edward's fury with Jasper, who had ruined his wedding and stolen the one he loved, who was conceivably in very much pain, and I could understand why he wanted to keep me as well as himself away from Edward.

But the one thing more beyond words than my transformation memories was Jasper himself. While I was in pain, he was the one by my side, brushing away my sweaty hair when I was uncomfortable, rubbing my hand soothingly when the agony was high, and holding me when I got cold, painfully like Edwards. But, I knew it wasn't him, and it made me more moody and I felt alone.

Even after all of these years, I am still hesitant and undecided. Edward stopped searching for me, damn him, he's given up on me. So I've had awhile to think about this, and I realized something. It was a half-hearted effort, not enough to make any progress. Maybe he didn't want to really find me, all for show for Carlisle and Alice…

As the wind gave an unusually strong breeze, I picked up a familiar species scent. My midnight-black eyes snapped open as I took in the scent, my natural instincts bringing me out of my reminiscence, and I sat up in the snow, my eyes wary. And just like that, the wind whistled, and he was there.

"Hello," Jasper said, folding his legs beneath him as he sat neatly on the snow. I chose to merely nod, annoyed that he had caught me off of my guard. He looked at me for a moment, and then turned his head away, disappointed with my lackluster greeting. I had noticed that his eyes matched mine, and I was more irritated.

"Why didn't you hunt?" I asked him, in a clipped voice. My previously lenient mood was now going to be aggravated for the rest of the day. How easily I was set off these days!

He shrugged, processing my strange mood, his eyes confused. He ruffled his blonde hair, watching the snow like I had been previously doing. "I don't know. I wasn't in the mood to kill at the moment, though I am hungry now. You look hungry, too…do you want to go back?" I grimaced, not wanting to go but knowing that half the reason I was so morose was because of my lack of diet. I rose stiffly, stretching out my legs from the inactivity. I looked down at Jasper briefly, waiting his response.

"Do you want to go with me?" I asked him finally, not really wanting him to but being polite anyways. Jasper sensed my need for an escape, and he shook his head.

"Go on ahead. I'll catch up later." His eyes drifted down from my face, all the way to my legs. I scowled at his preoccupation, turning on my heel and starting off with an impatient flip of my hair, my mood altered back again.

"Not in the mood, Jasper," I muttered to myself, not really caring if he heard. I took a slow start, digging my heels into the snow, and then I was flying. The cool breeze whipped back my hair as I ran full tilt to the first acceptable place I could find to hunt. Now, as I was running, my adrenaline came up, and I realized it had been awhile since I had _really _run. Not just to another location with Jasper at my side, but now with nothing holding me back. It felt powerful, and I welcomed it.

As I ran on, I sniffed the air, picking up any passing animals suitable for my now ravenous hunger. It had taken me a little while to realize it, but I was really hungry, and I searched more intently. Mm, deer, deer, more deer, fox...nothing good so far, squirrel, turkey, deer…

I stopped dead in my tracks as a painfully familiar scent hit my nose. Skidding against the snow, and sending a sheet of it across the surface, my eyes dilated as my senses kicked into high-alert, painstakingly raking my surroundings. I turned in a 360 degrees turn, scanning my surroundings. He was close, I could smell him.

My anger boiling, I half wanted to go and get Jasper and move again. It had been so long since we've had to, but something held me back. I wanted to face him myself. I wanted answers, I wanted them fast, and I wanted them now.

I started up again, but it wasn't for food and it wasn't for Jasper. I was searching for Edward.

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Please R&R! (By the way, I am working on my wedding chapter for "Your Wish." I didn't forget! I'm just working out the wedding details that are oh-so-annoying and time consuming..rolls eyes) anyways, hope u like it:P 


	2. Reunion and Answers

**Here it is! Please enjoy, and comment, there will be more!! **

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Taking in the crisp air as I ran, I realized this was the first time there had been any real excitement in the past years of my vampire life. Sure, there had been the few moments of danger when Jasper and I had encountered a small vampire clan, fresh out of the mountains. A little brawl for territory, and then they were on their way, deciding this wasn't where they wanted to settle anyways, and of course the few human hunters that we had to be minutely wary of (bullets? Don't make me laugh), but all in all nothing like this. Here there were answers that I had been searching for; here there was a chance to encounter my past life, something that I had not considered up until now. Could things be the same?

No, of course they weren't, even if we pretended near to total delusion, it wouldn't come close.

Nothing could erase that day, that awful day that screwed up my whole life. The more I though about it, the more it frustrated me. Why hadn't I just left Jasper as soon as I was set right, leaving him behind with his own damn thoughts to keep him company? Let him soak with the shame of taking his future sister-in-law away from the love of her life out of fear for a small retribution that was now beyond inexcusable. Made a mountain out of a molehill, as the humans refer to occasionally. I realized what could have happened if Jasper had just dealt with his cowardice and thirst, and it made my throat contract just thinking about it. I wouldn't have been changed by my preferred vampire, but so what? I could have dealt with it, and I would be in Edward's arms, not Jaspers. I used to have respect for Jasper! How quickly that disappeared when he took away me life. Edward would have been mine, mine only, and we could have been vampires together. No limits, no boundaries to our relationship that he had always carefully placed.

And now…I was chasing after the man that had given up on me for some time now. What the hell was I doing? For no reason, Edward stopped looking for me. Probably out of loss of love, loss of his so-close-to-being wife, loss of interest. I mean, c'mon. I was just a stupid human that could have been replaced anyways. Nothing special, a shard of wood next to a brilliant diamond. Always, there was always that doubt that he didn't really love me, and for some strange reason he hung around. That had almost come true; he had left me once, but came back and claimed to still love me. But it happened again. This time he had just _given up._

Slowing to a walk, I stumbled one step forward, then heaved myself onto the snowy ground, my emotions disabling my energy. Heaving a breath, I involuntarily reached up to wipe my eyes from the tears that had stopped flowing for over a decade. I stopped my hand halfway, but I still felt strange moisture brimming up in my midnight eyes, and once again brought a hesitant hand to my eye, and my finger met a single silver tear, precariously dangling on my snowy skin.

I gasped, and I couldn't take my eyes away from it. It was the most beautiful thing, a swirling mercury-silver teardrop about ready to break from my fingertip. What made it so…intoxicating? A vampire tear, something I had not learned of or ever experienced before. Had I really never cried a tear as a vampire? Was I really a selfless stone, nothing more than a rock who doesn't feel? But something about the tear…reminded me. There used to be a strange beauty in vampires, when I was human. They were nothing more then a beautiful, shining, radiant diamond, filled with so much vehement seduction and mystery. This was when I realized the tear reminded me of him. Silver, metallic vampire tears reminded me of Edward. And without warning, another single drop rolled over my eye and slid down my cheek, and crawled down my cheek, smooth as glass and cool as the winter air.

And just as unexpected, a smooth, inescapably enigmatic white hand brushed the tear away from my cheek, pausing tentatively on my jaw, snow-cold skin meeting its match.

"Bella…?" The voice trembled ever so slightly, as if it doubted its very eyes.

No. No, no, no, hell no! This voice, this voice had haunted my memory for the past lonely years, still there and kept as dearly realistic as possible, ripped through that measly reminder and was replaced with the real, honest-to-goodness thing. The voice, velvet and charismatic, was better than anything I had ever experienced in my life, so charming on the outside but still the edgy reminder of his nature lurking in the background, still inexplicable and beautiful as anything. Nothing compared. No, no, no, not him! But, please, please, be you… don't hurt me anymore…

The hand quivered faintly, and moved down to the hollow of my neck, confirming its fears.

"No pulse," I verified quietly, useless information that had been true for so, so long now, and I was sick of it. And the feeling of familiar, cool hands touching me gently overwhelmed me suddenly, and before I knew what was happening, I was in his arms, crying broken, heartless sobs into the suede material of his jacket that smelled like home.

"Bella, Bella, Bella, its okay now, I'm here, its okay now sweetheart," he chanted over and over, his voice breaking in some places with the overwhelming emotion we both felt. Cool liquid dripped onto the back of my neck, sliding down and seeping into the cloth of my thin dress, staining it silver. Tears of beautiful reunion, and all of my anger and bitterness to him had disappeared almost as soon as I heard his voice. He had that influence over me, and he always had. I have my doubts about his love for me, but there was no denying the power he had over me. Here in his arms, it was hard to tell myself that he didn't love me. But he was good at lying, and I had no clue what his real feelings were at the moment, despite the emotion that leaked through our embrace. Grudgingly, I detangled myself from his stony arms, and felt a small gleam of pride as I realized mine were almost as hard as his, cool and slender but not as muscular. Reaching up, I swept my hand across his honey-colored eyes, tinted around the edges with silver, and dragged a tear from his eye. He smiled crookedly, embarrassed to have me see him in such a vulnerable position, but too ecstatic to really care. I hated myself for doubting him, but I had to set things straight.

"Edward, I know this is totally not the time, but I have to set thing straight right this minute. Are you or are you not still in love with me. Don't be afraid of hurting me, really, I'll be fine. Just tell me the honest truth." I sat in his lap paitently, bracing myself for whatever he had for me.

"Bella, I love you. I only stopped searching for you because I though you would be happy without me." He smiled, and stroked my hair gently. "I still love you, vampire or not.." He burned his eyes into mine, making where my heart (should be) ache. I lost myself in their depth, but was still being nagged.

"Edward..." I sighed, and took his hand, placing it on my cheek. "I know that if I say what I'm really thinking, it will take you forever and ever to convince me that you're not going to leave me, even if it isn't true." I silenced him as he started to protest. "I'm just saying. I'd like to think that you won't leave me, but look what has happened. So I don't think I could ever really know your true feelings. I was fooled into thinking you didn't want me anymore, and yet you came back, claiming that you still do. Look how easily I can swallow your lies, Edward!" I paused, swallowed, and tried to ignore the anguished look in his eyes.

"So that still leaves us at square one. I don't know if you really, truly love me or not." Once again, I silenced him with my other hand, gently covering his mouth. "I'm sorry it has to be this way. You could tell me ten thousand times you love me, and it could be true, or it might not be. And that's my burden to bear, I guess. But you know what?" I asked, making up my mind. "I don't think I really care. I love _you_, and I don't care if you pretend or not, I'm going to be very naive and go along with it. Because I love you so much, I wouldn't care if you just kept me around as an appetizer; not funny, I know, but I'm willing to delude myself for you." I sat quietly, now over with my sermon.

And what I said was true. At this rate, I didn't care if he loved me or not. I was sticking around anyways. And there would be no way to tell, since time was now off the list, since he had used up that promise. I would just stick around anyways.

"Bella…" Edward trailed off, a note of grudging aggravation in his voice. "I…I want to so _badly.. _just convince you that I really love you. You have no idea how much it pains me, hearing your doubts on my love for you!" He rubbed small circles on my cheek. "But if you're willing to stick around, I will too. I do love you, and I don't care if you think it's fake or not. I just do. So nothing can get in the way of that."

"Oh," came a cutting male voice. "I can think of a few things."

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**Ooooh...scary!! Lol, Please R&R**


	3. Complications and the Undeniable Truth

Omg, this is so exciting! Here is the third chapter of Prelude to Winter!! Please enjoy, and please R&R (and don't kill me after you read this, I was killing myself allready!!)

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Well, two things haven't changed in the past decade or so.

One was the inevitable Jasper Cullen. He was once again here in my life, with no need for an invitation or my permission, just making my decisions and being such a villain it mad me wonder if he had ever been as gallant as he had made out to be, in the earlier days. When I had trusted and even respected him. I can tell you that those days are far from long gone.

And here he was again, interfering with one of the best moments in my vampire existence. Here he was, trying to stir trouble for a reason unknown to me, maybe a reason I couldn't comprehend if I did know. Why does he cause so much trouble for me?

And the second. The Cullen's are very, very strong, cunning, and deadly. And I was stuck in between two of them, right in the middle of a territorial, long-awaited battle that wouldn't have happened if it hadn't been for that fateful wedding day.

"Jasper…E-Edward...stop..!" I spoke through gritted teeth, my hands placed on both of their chests in an effort to keep peace, but my efforts were weak compared to the fury that wafted through their struggling limbs that longed to meet the others and crush, tear, and , dare I think, kill. This was how serious this was. I didn't much care about Jasper, but if he harmed Edward he could bet on his sorry ass that he would hear from me.

"Bella, get. Out. Of. My…Way!!" Edward growled in a low, velvety deadly voice that would have scared the shit out of me if I wasn't capable of that voice myself. I flinched from the venom absolutely leaking from his voice. "I'm going to _KILL_ that bastard!" He yelled suddenly, making another effort to advance to Jasper. Though it was tempting, I tried to hold him back.

"Edward…I _know_ you're...angry, but you...mustn't! We can work this...out _peacefully_..!" I grunted, shoving my shoulder against his stony chest, placing both hands on his chest in another effort to restrain him.

Big mistake.

As soon as I let go of Jasper, he immediately took advantage of the situation, sidestepped me, and before I could notice what was happening, lunged for Edward from the behind, taking him and myself by surprise.

"Jasper, NO!" I screamed, diving forward a moment too late, my hand grasping air and coming up with nothing. Edward and Jasper were on the ground, Edward clutching at Jasper's limbs, and Jasper restraining him while trying to keep them at an angle so they wouldn't be broken. I disregarded the 'peaceful' route and threw myself on top of them, grasping Jaspers arms and fighting to break them free of the vice-like grip he had on Edward. I was scared for their lives and mine as well, but that was set aside as I tried to help out Edward.

I grunted, and placed my foot on Jasper's face, inspiration clicking in. I started to press down, but before I could even move, Jasper reached up one hand and got a hold of my ankle, and yanked down so I fell down next to him, pinning my leg to his side. I cried out in pain, and my cry made Edward struggle more vainly, snarling almost panting with the effort to get free.

I lashed out unthinkingly, catching his wrist and twisting it free. Jasper winced, realizing what position he was now in. He couldn't hold two vampires down, and definitely not two severely _pissed_ vampires. My adrenaline instincts kicked in, and I realized I'd been keeping in these instincts for awhile. I usually am a non violent person, but I realized I hadn't tested that yet since I had become a vampire. I was so tired of standing on the sidelines, so tired of being helpless and the 'damsel in distress.'

Moving quickly, I distracted Jasper by making a random lunge for his leg; he realized what I had aimed for and caught my other hand, unintentionally releasing Edward and securing my other hand on the other side of his head. Edward agilely rolled off to the side, righting himself, and coming to my aid he pushed me out of the way, quickly tucked his head in and caught Jasper around his middle, throwing his off his feet with a deafening sound from the impact. I bounced back up, and was prepared to go back, but what I saw made me hesitate.

Both vampires had started to circle one another, guttural snarls ripping instinctively from their throats. I would have gone in and broken it up, but something about the look in their eyes told me that it was beyond my help now. This was just the two of them.

"Jasper," I blurted out, not even realizing what was coming out of my mouth. "Why are you fighting? What is there to gain from taking Edward away from me?" I shut my mouth, concerned that I had broken their concentration, but still wanting to know the answer. Though his eyes stayed focused, his mouth twitched up into a knowing smile to let me know that he acknowledged my question.

"Well, Bella, I though you'd never ask," Jasper said, too quiet for human ears. Edward's eyes flashed, though not breaking his hawk-like gaze.

"Don't _listen_ to that traitor, Bella," he rumbled, crouching lower still. "Can you really trust the man who _bit_ you and turned you into a _vampire_ then takes you _away_ from _me_?" His voice dripped with implications and deadliness. I frowned. I knew he probably couldn't be trusted, but I wanted answers.

"Jasper?" I asked again, ignoring Edward's furious growls. "Will you tell me the truth? I think you owe it to me to just tell me the truth."

Jasper's face contorted, weighing his options-probably weighing whether to lie, tell part of the truth, or just tell me the truth. I waited patiently, surveying their stances.

Again, this was a mistake. Jasper was momentarily distracted, and Edward was gone in a flash, only to appear a second later to slam into Jasper with such force that a boom resounded off of the trees, making them sway and shudder. Staggering backwards, Jasper fought to keep his footing, but he finally dug his heels into the frozen ground. He cleverly shifted against Edward's arms blindingly fast, thrusting his shoulder into Edward's stomach and with a small scream of protest from me, Edward bent over and sank to the ground, momentarily injured and unable to move. And before I could move to Edward's side, to even shift in the slightest, I was on the ground and Jasper on top of me, pinning me to the snowy earth. I struggled under his weight, thoroughly disgusted with his behavior.

"Jasper, get the hell off-!" I started to protest, trying to free myself, but he clamped his cold hand over my mouth, glancing over in Edward's direction quickly. Bringing his eyes back to mine, he leaned very close to me, his breath fanning across my face, keeping my gaze evenly.

"Bella, listen very closely to what I have to say, I don't have much time until he can get up. I'm going to tell you the complete truth, but you must grasp the concept that I am not the 'bad guy' here." He waited a fraction of a second, but continued on before I had a chance to reach. "No, you know what, that doesn't even matter, I'm going to tell you anyways and you can judge me however you want." Edward made a small groaning sound behind us, and Jasper hurried along, speaking way too fast for human ears, and even I had to listen closely to grasp what he was saying.

"Okay, well, a little bit before your…_wedding,_ Alice had a vision. Nothing really out of the ordinary, just a vampire being created, but she sees that all the time, so nothing strange about that. But as time progressed, the visions came more often, and they were all the same except for this new vampire was getting, well, _inhumanly_ strong for a vampire, as far as that goes anyways. And it was strange for this to be happening, for Alice to be seeing this strange vampire. It was unlike any vampire that we'd ever known of, and there was something that had most definitely been wrong with this vampire, but it seemed more that the vampire that had created it had been the cause of this, like some strange disease-carrier. We kept to ourselves, as much as we hit ourselves for that now, resolving to get to the bottom of this." Behind us, we heard Edward roll over, a crunching sound in the snow. Jasper's eyes became frantic, and he hastily got to the point.

"Bella, if I hadn't bitten you on your wedding day, it would have been you, the vampire in Alice's visions. You were that vampire, and I prevented you from becoming that vampire by changing you myself and taking you away not for my own selfish reasons, but to protect you and Edward. Do you understand? I protected you both, in a way, because you might not realize it now, but Edward is really-!"

And then his body was gone, off me in a matter of a few precarious seconds. A shattering crash echoed as Jasper flew into a tree, crushing it and sending millions of sharp splinters into the air. I sat there in shock, not aware of the pieces of wood flying through the air, some grazing my skin, but of course I did not bleed. I could just not believe how close I had been to knowing the whole truth, the whole reason that had been kept a secret for over a decade.

I sat there for a few minutes, the seconds ticking on, and I realized the only sound I heard was my ragged breathing. I blinked a few times, clearing the haze, and looked around.

"Edward?" I called hoarsely, my voice faint.

"Over here," he replied equally as quietly. I looked over to my left, following his voice. My eyes settled on his figure about a couple dozen yards, and I froze as I realized he was crouching next to a motionless, crumpled figure.

"Jasper!" I cried, lurching to my feet and dashing to their side, reaching his body and slumping next to his. I reached out to touch his stony face, blank and sickeningly silent.

"I-is he…" I asked in a quavering voice, so, so scared to hear the answer.

"Yes," Edward replied gravely. "Jasper's dead."

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cries I'm so saaad... he died!!! Don't kill me too much...


	4. Frozen Over

Hey people! Senpiacuite64 here. I do not own anything (duh) but I wish I did :D And without further ado, I give you 'Frozen Over' of Prelude to Winter. Sorry for the delay, and please comment!

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_The midnight glow pulses in rapture of the feathers falling, lost in a haze of delusion and porcelain hearts. Enjoy the silence, for the last mourning song lost to the wind is the scent of the trapped and forgotten. The morphine never set in, the pain never dulled, and here I lay, screaming in silent voice drowned out by the venom that has become the tragic truth of me. _

_In the hand of the ominous dark I reside, bound by the crumbling chains that still imprison my body that was never quite whole anyways. The poison mercury tears that will always be shed remain on the hushed beats of my heart, making it hard to breathe the air mixed with grief and terrible beauty._

_Beyond salvation, in memory of the tainted innocence of spring, the nighttime masquerade is forever, along with the bleeding elixir that feeds off of my stony memories. If shadows wrote diaries, in treason we'd trust, isolating the cool, gray waters of the damned. The ripple of you, the scent of your soul, is precisely wound to block the cascading light that was once my life._

_senpaicutie64

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"Jasper!" I screamed, throwing myself over him, taking his face in my hands and searching his unnervingly silent face with sheer dread. "Jasper! _JASPER_!!"

Tears welled up in my eyes, seeped over and landing on Jaspers chest, little drops of silver contrasting with his white shirt. How amazing it was that a few minutes ago I would not have been overcome with such emotion for the man I had wrongly judged for a long time. But now, I had been so close to knowing the real truth.

Edward was sitting in stony silence opposite me, his dark eyes icy and tortured, though I was past able to comfort him, much less myself. He had just potentially killed his brother; I couldn't even imagine how much pain he could be in, no matter that he had been ready to kill him earlier. He knew nothing about Jasper; we had both judged him wrong.

I sat back slowly, removing my arms from his chest, trailing them softly, letting a few more tears fall. I studied his face- angular and leonine, with honey blonde hair. But something had changed; he was now silent, guard down, and now strangely childish. His face, before full of emotion, was wiped blank and looked rather like a child dreaming. So vulnerability started the flow of tears again, and I chose not to stop them, letting a small sob escape my lips. Edward tore his gaze away from Jasper, and slowly pulled out of his thoughts.

"Bella…" he trailed off, reaching up a cold hand to touch my equally cool cheek, dragging his fingers to catch my tears. "Shhh, Bella," he soothed me in his musical voice, as I let another whimper escape my throat, and the tears came still. Edward moved fluidly across Jasper, over to my side, pulling me on his lap and cradling me like a child. Rubbing my back in an attempt to quiet me only made me more depressed; this was so messed up.

"E-Edward," I said, my voice trembling, "I…I…we were w-wrong about him. Jasper, I m-mean. He shouldn't have died, he was carrying information I needed…" I broke off, and buried my face in Edward's shoulder blade. Edward had stiffened a bit, taking in my words.

"Bella? What…" he trailed off, pulling on my shoulders so he could get a good look at me. "What are you talking abo-?"

"Bella."

That familiar voice. I had wanted to hear it so bad, and I feared it had been too late.

"_Jasper!_" I cried in elation, relief coursing through me. Of course, I had been stupid. Vampires couldn't die unless they were burned.

I wrenched myself from Edward's arms, and instantly was at Jasper's side, casting my arms around his neck gently, making care not to hurt him. His eyes had fluttered open, and it seemed to be costing him much effort. Edward had also appeared at his side, though he did not seem surprised at all. Damn him, he had known all along that he hadn't been dead. He wanted him to die.

"Edward, do you have a heart?" I hissed from Jasper's chest, my eyes piercing his. "I told you, he's not like we thought he was. Your own brother, show some emotion! He's injured!" I glared at him wordlessly, and Edward seemed surprised by my outburst. He hadn't seen the full extent of my vampire temper yet. I turned back to Jasper, my long hair trailing across his face.

"Jasper?" I asked softly, watching him, monitoring him with care. "What hurts, Jasper? Where did you hurt yourself?"

Jasper's eyes fluttered delicately, and he smiled weakly. "Did you happen to see how I hit that boulder?" he asked quietly. I frowned, and lifted my head to look around.

"There's no boulder." I stated, confused. My eye caught a shard on the ground, and with closer examination I realized that it was a shaving of stone. My eyes swept the ground- there were many, many more. "Ah. I see," I said acidly, "Edward gotcha pretty good, didn't he?" I head a small noise of indignation behind me, but I chose to ignore it. Jasper smiled, and managed a weak laugh.

"Yeah, well, it's not his fault, is it?" Jasper commented quietly. His eyes traveled to Edward, and his smile slowly faded. "I came off pretty criminal, didn't I?" he finally said, and coughed slightly. I stroked his hair away from his face, and loosened my arms to give him some breathing space. He cleared his throat, and continued. "I'm sorry. I had my reasons, and none of them were my own." Edward's eyes narrowed, and he eyed his brother with suspicion.

"Why, though? What motive could you possibly have had to take Bella away from me?" He snarled quietly in between words. "Away from a happy life? And you're trying to say it was not in benefit of yourself?" Jasper sighed, and coughed a rattling cough. I watched him with concern, and yet curiosity to where this conversation would go.

"I know, but what else could I have done? I'm sure, if you listen to me, you'd figure it out. We all knew that you were planning to change Bella yourself." I thought I saw Edward's jaw tighten, but I might have been imagining it.

"Yes, that's obvious, and that's what she wanted anyways. I'm not the one to break a bargain." He kept his voice even, strained polite and controlled but anxious for the point of the conversation. "What are you trying to say?"

"I think you can see the flaw in your plan. What were you thinking?" An edge, however feeble, entered Jasper's voice. "Did you have some ultimate plan to worm your way out? Or were you just planning to change her into someone like yourself?" Edward's jaw this time had tightened, his teeth coming together audibly, and his eyes flashing in surprise. Jasper had obviously hit a well-covered secret. If Jasper hadn't warned me before, I would have just assumed that he meant Edward changing me into a vampire. But now, it dawned on me, Jasper had warned me about Ewdard's 'special condition'. I leaned forward involuntarily, processing the tense atmosphere with concentration.

"How…?" Edward asked, disbelieving. His eyes flickered over to me, careful not to reveal too much. I narrowed my eyes, immediately suspicious. What else was he keeping from me now?

"Edward?" I asked, keeping my voice level, getting straight to the point. "What _are_ you?"

Edward's brow furrowed. "Jasper, I don't know how you figured out, and how much you figured out, but I wasn't planning on turning her into…my _condition, _if you will. I'm not that bad, even if I am contaminated, unlike any other vampire that I've known. And I can't imagine Carlisle told you, he's the only one that knows. Not even Esme. Did Alice see something?"

Jasper frowned. "Well, yes. She saw what you just denied, though I'm not sure what to trust now, her visions or you're word."

Edward snarled quietly. "Well, Jasper," he spat, enunciating deliberately. "You make me out to be a total delinquent. You notice that I carry none of the characteristics, and though I may have my moments, I am only half, but it's enough to make it clear that I am half _werewolf_."

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Kasha!!! I know, it's most likely not possible, but I have it all laid out, and yes, it is. I'll make it work, and you'l luv it!! I cannot wait to write more, it's AWESOME!!! Some old character's will be introduced..I decided I'm going to go all out with this story, so you'll see lots more soon. Please R&R :D 


	5. Blood Tears and A Familiar Feeling

Hey everyone! Senpaicutie here. It's taken a bit, and I finished it in one day, so it might not be perfect, but hey, it's here! And I'm quite happy the way this is turning out, btw :) please enjoy the 5th chapter! Please review, also, as always!

* * *

It starts with love

One thing, I don't know why

It doesn't even matter how hard you try

Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme

To explain in due time

All I know

Time is a valuable thing

Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings

Watch it count down till the end of the day

The clock ticks life away

It's so unreal

You didn't look out below

Watch the time go right out the window

Trying to hold on

Didn't even know, I wasted it all

Just to watch you go

I kept everything inside

And even though I tried

It all fell apart

What's meant to be will eventually be

A memory of a time.

**-In the End, Linkin Park**

* * *

This was absolutely insane. Delusional, and most definitely hypocritical. Absolute lunacy, absolutely crazy and so far fetched it couldn't possibly be true. Until now.

"You've got to be joking," I breathed, faint notes of hysteria and disbelief leaking through my voice that was bordering on pleading. "C'mon," I pushed Edward's shoulder softly, and forced out a small laugh. It sounded more like a whimper to my ears. His smooth forehead crumpled as he scrutinized my expression.

"I am one hundred percent serious, Bella. Do you see any humor here?"

His onyx eyes stared into mine, and my stomach sank as I could find no trace of joking. I desperately turned to Jasper, searching his face. He shook his head, and struggled to sit up. Remembering his injury, I quickly moved to his side, lifting his head and resting it on my lap. I could feel Edward's eyes on me, but I refused to meet his gaze as I made Jasper comfortable.

"We should get help," I murmured, watching Jasper's face contort, pained by his movements. I looked up unwillingly, and met the eyes that were locked on my face. I was silent for a moment, meeting his gaze evenly, unable to decipher his expression.

"How did it happen?" I finally said, breaking the silence. He didn't have to ask what I meant.

"I'll call Carlisle," Edward said blankly, trying to evade my question. I wasn't letting him go that easily, but Jasper had to be moved. I felt the warm liquid on my lap, and realized how many injuries he had sustained. I lifted my hand up from under his head, and with a small gasp, I realized that the liquid was silver.

"What…?" I breathed quietly. "We...bleed our tears?"

"No," I head Jasper speak up, a small smile in his voice. "More like, our tears are our blood. Our tears are vampire blood." I shook my head; all this information in such a short time wasn't being processed normally. There was still so much, after all this time, that I had to learn about this cold world. Edward was half-werewolf... it was so insane. Hadn't he complained and bad-mouthed werewolves his whole life?

I heard a soft crunching of snow, and I looked up. He had gotten to his feet, and he was staring off in the far wood.

"What is it?" I questioned him quietly, almost as if a loud voice would disturb Jasper's health. I realized that it was close; Jasper had drifted off in my lap, his dark eyes shut and his face peaceful, but oddly still.

"Bella…" I realized that Edward's voice was burning, hiding a very strong emotion beneath. I turned my head, wishing I could see his face.

"What is it Edward?" I asked again, this time more urgently.

"Do you know where we are?" he finally asked me, turning his face a fraction of an inch, his eyes closed. I waited until he opened them, and turned fully until he was facing me. His face seemed very ancient, yet fierce with a strange determination.

"No," I finally spoke, offhanded. Scenery wasn't exactly the first thing I took a look at. I searched the area, ridden with splinters of rock and wood. We were in a small parting in the forest, surrounded by forest, nothing unordinary. But as I carefully picked apart my surroundings, a familiar feeling crept into my body, and I was curious.

"This place…its déjà vu," I admitted, meeting his eyes. "It's special, isn't it? Where _are_ we?"

Edward slowly took a step towards me, and another. Soon he was less than a foot from me, and he swiftly lowered to the ground, crouching in front of me so our eyes were level. My eyes flickered from his eyes to the scenery around me, and I became more anxious as some very vague memories resurfaces.

Tentatively, Edward took my hand in his two larger ones. They seemed surprisingly warm to me, and I leaned forward unconsciously, our faces now inches apart.

"We're here, Bella. We're in our meadow."

My eyes widened in shock, and everything fell into place.

"Our meadow? Are you sure?" I looked around, and sure enough, it was all there. The frozen creek nearby, the slight hill that we rested our heads on when the weather was nice…

I suddenly felt a cold hand on my face, and as I turned back, Edward's cool lips met mine. Taken by surprise, I meant to turn away, but his other hand moved to my face, securing me as his sweet breath filled my head, still making me dizzy after all these years. I kissed him back, deciding it was pointless to turn away.

He dropped his hands, and I opened my eyes to find him smiling against my lips, his dark eyes filled with warmth. I was quiet, wanting to lose myself in them forever.

"Thank you," he said simply.

* * *

Alice P.O.V.

Staring out the window at the swirling snow, I began to think of Jasper. It had been some time since I had actually seen him, though we kept in touch. _What are you doing now? _I thought, touching the cool glass with my fingertips. I sighed, and turned away from the window, folding my arms and resting against the wall. Thinking about him made me depressed. I sensed someone entering the room, but I didn't have to look up to know who it was.

"Hello, Carlisle," I greeted him half-heartedly, avoiding his gaze. He moved silently to my side, looking out the window with faraway eyes.

"You don't need to worry about him, you know," Carlisle spoke up in his wise, low voice. I frowned, and finally met his eyes.

"I'm not worried," I lied, quickly sneaking a look out into the snow, as if he'd appear at any moment. I sighed; it was pointless to lie around Carlisle. "Well, I am," I admitted finally, determined to not catch his knowing gaze. I could feel him smile beside me.

"I know, Alice. But Jasper is strong, you know that, and he's out there for a reason. When the time comes, he'll tell her the truth, and we can finally see him again. But he's obviously not ready yet, and Jasper has good judgment. When the time is right, he'll come back, with or without Bella I cannot say." He sighed heavily. "Bella I cannot be sure on. She has changed, more or less, and I'm afraid for Edward. After not seeing her around, he's changed. It's like the last time they were separated. He won't talk much, he'll just go out or stay in his room." I could tell Carlisle had been holding this in for awhile, and I did my best to listen without my stomach sinking in fear as I realized the truth.

Carlisle turned, and held my gaze quietly. "Do you fear for Edward's well being?"

I swallowed, and unfolded my arms, placing them at my sides. "Yes. It's a lot like last time, and I'm wondering myself if I shouldn't just go out and try to find them, to bring them back. How hard can it be for Bella to know about the truth?" Carlisle pursed his full lips, and sighed again.

"That's the problem though, Alice. Bella, being without him and the real truth all this time, it would be a miracle if she even looked him in the face. After all, she probably believes that he had given up on her, and there's not much we can do about that." I clamped my teeth together-this was very simple.

"Yes, I know, but-!" I burst out, a little louder than I had meant to. Carlisle looked over at me in surprise at me outburst.

"What?" he asked, his tone taken aback.

"Jasper should just tell her the truth! Then she would know, she would know why she ended up alone with Jasper, she would know why he stopped looking. This is a two-sided story, Carlisle! Tell Edward why Jasper had to take her away! Then things could finally be back to normal!" I cried, my hands unconsciously curling into fists. Carlisle studied me with wise and concerned eyes.

"I understand, Alice," he said quietly, "but the whole issue to begin with was whether or not Bella would accept him as a half-blood. That's why we can't tell her, not yet. That's Edward's call, if she does come around. And in truth, we may never see her again-"

"No, Carlisle, no!" I cut in, inwardly shocked I was speaking to him like this, but this was just so exasperating. "Stop saying these things! We're talking about Bella, here! She loved him, she'll love him anyways if we just _tell them the truth_. It's a risk, sure, but we should take it for them! For Edward, for Bella, Jasper too!" I glared at him, running out of steam quickly. After a few seconds, I re-folded my arms, turning away.

"I apologize, Carlisle," I murmured. "That was out of place." He shook his head, forgiving as always.

"Don't worry, I always encourage you to speak your mind," he said forgivingly, gently patting my spiky hair. I swallowed, and shrugged my shoulders.

"Anyways, we'll see them eventually, so it doesn't matter. A couple years, whenever, I can wait for them too-" I trailed off as I noticed Carlisle had gone rigid beside me, his eyes intent and slightly disbelieving. I frowned.

"What is it?" I asked.

"You…won't have to wait any longer," Carlisle whispered, though perfectly clear to my ears. My head snapped up, and I turned to the window. "They're all here."

* * *

Edward and Bella (and Jasper, too) have returned!!! Aww, sweet reunion is next! (Or not-so-sweet... you'll have to read more!!) Oh, and sorry this chapter was a little crappy. It was rushed, but I needed to post SOMETHING. TTTT I've been deprived! Anways, please review. 


	6. Feeling's Don't Waver

**_It's baaack!! Sorry for ending it, but I didn't know how to go on. But it's back now, for good!! PLease R&R, and thank you for waiting._**

**_Stephenie Meyer owns all characters. _**

**_Previously on Prelude to WInter- Bella and Edward try to talk about his werewolf condition, but instead they move Jasper to the Cullen's house. ALice and Carlisle have a mini fight about how long it will be before Jasper and Bella return, but then they show up in the front yard, carrying the wounded Jasper._**

* * *

**Maybe it's just me, Couldn't you believe  
That everything I said and did, wasn't just deceiving  
And the tear in your eye, and your calm hard face  
Makes me wish that I was never brought into this place**

**There goes my ring  
It might as well have been shattered  
and I'm here to sing  
about the things that mattered  
about the things that made us feel alive for oh so long  
about the things that kept you on my side when I was wrong**

**-Maybe, Secondhand Serenade**

As I walked up to the Cullens's large house, I really thought it'd be okay with this. It would be okay, I'd told myself countless times, just go back to the way you were before. But as I took in the timeless features, numerous flashes of déjà vu overtook me, and I couldn't help but wonder.

_How were we the way before?_

Well, I could remember Alice, for one, she was my best friend in the Cullen family, besides the obvious. Then there was Emmett, who always played jokes on me. There was the beautiful Rosalie, the mother figure Esme, and the warmhearted doctor Carlisle.

_But how did I act around them?_

Was it all in just good fun? Were we serious? Were we all just like a big family?

I glanced at Ewdard, who was carrying Jasper beside me. He had noticed my preoccupation, and frowned.

"Is everything all right, Bella?" he asked, frowning the slightest bit. He blinked. "Nervous to see them again?"

I scowled. "Not really," I lied, crossing my arms. "Let's go."

But as we neared the door, I could see two familiar figures in the doorway. One was very small and petite, the other masculine and blonde. Their faces were so familiar, and it felt so surreal to feel their presence once again. This place felt comforting, like home, but something was missing.

As Alice and Carlisle registered my appearance, I suddenly remembered how I was in my prior life. I was vulnerable, easily flustered, clumsy, and was lovesick to the core. I was eager to start my life with Edward, rushing into things I wasn't ready for, blinded with desire. And most importantly, human.

Well, now I was a vampire, and living my life as a nomad had hardened me. I was quick to fire up, my bad moods came often, and if I wanted to do something, I'd do it. My previous lust for the immortal path had teetered obsession, and now that I was a vampire, I took things to the extreme without realizing it. I was tough, and needed no protection.

I was beautiful now, not plain. I was graceful, not awkward. I was independent, not needy. I was vampire, not human. I was not the Bella they used to know.

_Could things really go back to 'normal'?_

That's what would be ideal, of course. My being able to walk in the Cullen's door, embrace everyone, to say 'I'm home.' To be able to apologize to Jasper, to Edward, to everyone. To start all over, to continue loving Edward.

What's ideal does not always happen, and sometimes what is ideal isn't the best choice, anyways. However much I wanted this to work, it was _just not going to work_. I would bring their happy down, I would be an irritating thorn in their side.

_I would make these kind people suffer._

Before my scattered mind had time to catch up, I was running. I had no idea where my feet were taking me, what I would do when they stopped, but this place was suffocating me. I needed to breathe air, air where could be alone.

Running, running. My head was blank of everything except how to move my legs, back and forth, propelling myself against the snow. _This is the only way_, I reminded myself, _these people won't want me anymore. I'm ashamed. I never want them to see who I have become._

_And It's not like I'll be giving them grief if I run away, _I reasoned bitterly. _They've managed a long time without me there, and if it takes another year or so to cool off my head, then so be-_

My thought process was interrupted as I felt a stone hand seize my forearm, stopping me in my tracks. Snow skidded out from under my bare feet, and I spun around in surprise.

"You shouldn't just run away like that without warning," Edward said reprovingly. "It's very perplexing."

I yanked my arm out of his grasp, taking a step back. I shook my head, fighting back the sudden urge to cry.

"You don't know. How it is for me, I mean. It's suffocating." My voice tuned down to an agonized whisper at the end. "Your family is so nice to me, Edward. You are too, and I have noting to give back but my bitterness." His eyes blazed, and I cut him off before he could tell me otherwise.

"Listen to me, Edward! I've _changed_, I'm not the Bella I used to be!" I bit down on my lip, trying to blink out the tears in my eyes. "You wouldn't want to be with me. I don't want to change you too." I looked up at him, though I couldn't see his face clearly; the silver tears were blurring my vision.

He sighed. "Isabella," he said, in a disapprovingly incredulous voice. "Do you really think that they don't want you, that I don't want you?" He smiled sadly, and reached out hesitantly to touch my cheek. "If you really do believe that, then you, my love, are sadly mistaken." I let a few tears spill, letting out a small sob.

"Edward, you don't know what you're saying…" I said through my tears. "What you're getting yourself into! What about your condition as part werewolf? What can we do with that?"

He shook his head, the small smile still playing on his face. "Allright then, I guess I don't know what I'm getting into. But Bella," he murmured, his voice silky and musical, "We can make this work. I'm ready to find out."

At this point, I didn't care. Let them hate me, let them love me, let them think whatever the hell they wanted to think. But the Cullen's weren't shallow kind people, they would help you and love you unconditionally, no matter how much of a rotten person you were.

I let myself fall into his arms, and cried many silver tears that had been held in. Things were changing again, but now I really believed, with Edward's help, that these changes were for the better.

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**_This is not the last chapter, I still have one or two left to go. Thank you for reading, please leave a comment!!_**


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